Finn & Rebecca

Finn & Rebecca

Sunday, October 23, 2011

Wow

Wow...respect for twin parents!

The days are merging into waking babies, feeding babies, winding babies, cleaning babies, dressing babies, loving babies, and then starting all over again! In the 45 minute intervals, you can try to snooze...hard though as they niggle a LOT and of course you are worried so you check on them all the time, or pop one into a sling or onto your chest - which they love. And you sneak in a snack, a quick shower, a quick google or post if lucky...haven't even got around to downloading pics yet - but am taking loads!  So more will be coming soon promise...

Oh dear...Finn is niggling...gotta go....

And feeding time is here again at 12pm...got to make bottles...oh heck...have to express now too...eeeeek what am I going to do when DH goes back to work tomorrow?? Heeeeelp.

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Our babies are home!

The twins weren't quite ready to come home on Friday as they still weren't finishing their bottles and the rule is, they have to finish all their bottles in 24 hours and then they can come home.  So we spent the weekend preparing for a possible Monday homecoming instead. And they caught up beautifully! On Monday morning, we got the call...come and fetch your babies!

Rebecca weighs 2.090kg and Finn 2.560kg so they have gained weight beautifully from their birth weights of 1.430kg and 1.940kg.  Also, they lost about 300g each in the week after being born so had to catch up that too.  I can't believe how well they have done in NICU with only a 4 week stay!

Instant butterflies in my tummy eeeek!  Finally after so very long, we would be welcoming our two precious little miracles into our home where they belong. It was incredibly nerve wracking fetching them and driving them home in their snug car seats looking so adorable.  They were hungry as we were just over feed time so the first thing we did when we got home was to start the feeding session.

Wow...we soon realised how daunting having two babies will be on a 3 hour cycle! On the hour, every 3 hours, we have to have everything sterilised, prepare the bottles, add whatever meds or vitamins needed, warm them, wake the babies, change the babies, get into feeding mode with burb cloth, feed the babies, wind the babies during and after the feed, let the babies settle, swaddle the babies, put the babies back to sleep. If all runs smoothly this takes an hour to an hour and a half.

Then I still have to fetch all expressing stuff and express milk for upcoming feeds. Then we have to wash all bottles, lable and store milk, re-wash used bottles and sterilise them etc.  Then of course there are the niggles - checking on the babies and making sure all okay and comfy. So all in all, we get an hour or so every 3 hours.  But try snooze next to them - not easy as they niggle and moan and cry every now and then so of course you are up in a shot to check on them. And this is every 3 hours, 8 times a day - 6am, 9am, 12pm, 3pm, 6pm, 9pm, 12am, 3am!!!!!! Because they are prem, they have to be fed every 3 hours so even if they are not awake, you have to wake them. They sleep, eat. wee, poo, have windy grins, burb, sleep, gurgle, niggle and eat again. 

This all sounds hectic and it is....but....how incredible beautiful and cute and gorgeous are these little treasures!  Having them with us is unbelievable.  It is pure love. I am under no illusion that we will take serious strain in the upcoming weeks and months, but every moment is as it should be.  I will treasure every second.

We have waited so long for this...and we will sleep again one day! I stockpiled enough sleep during 12 years of infertility!

Will add pics soon soon - just have to download from camera!

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Home coming...

It is very possible that the twins may be coming home on Friday!!!

Or Saturday or Monday - depending on how quickly they master the art of completing full bottle feeds without needing to be topped up by tube. SO exciting and SO scary at the same time!  Up until now, while all I have wanted is to be with them...in a strange way, I have become used to them being in the NICU knowing that they are being so well cared for.

Soon, they will become 100% our responsibility. No support from well-trained neonatal sisters. No one to whip them away for a feed, a change or to sort out a wind.  This will become our new life. I had a mild panic attack today trying to work out how the hell I was going to keep expressing and then also bottle feeding, changing and winding two babies every 3 hours?  When will I ever sleep? Eeeeeek!

Their sucking reflex is getting stronger but they are no way ready to solely breastfeed so will need most of their feeds by bottle until they get stronger and realise that they need to work a little harder to actually get milk flowing from the boob.  I introduced Rebecca to the boob for the first time today and she latched on only to promptly fall asleep.  Finn is slightly better - he has actually got down 10ml of breast milk by sucking, but today decided it was far too hard so also went to sleep...oh dear...lazy suckers!  I am sure with time they will get the hang of it. In the meantime though, poor mum is going to be busy trying to figure this whole feeding thing out...

It is more than a little daunting!

Tomorrow they have their eye tests and hearing tests.  If we are given the go ahead for discharge on Friday then I will room in overnight on Thursday to get the hang of things with a little night support.  Our CPR lesson is on Friday morning...and then...we may be loading up two babies and starting our lives as parents.  This is a huge and incredibly momentous thought.

I had their natal chart done by my astrologist and they have the most beautiful charts with some incredible aspects and amazing connections to us as parents....I am so overjoyed that they already seem to be so blessed with such an incredible beginning to their lives and am so excited at their potential.

It is going to be the most remarkable journey now to observe as they grow and develop into their own little people...what a blessing for us to be part of this miracle.

                                              Finn and Rebecca - about a week ago...

Thursday, October 6, 2011

34 Weeks old today!

Today the twins are 34 weeks old!!! They would have been born in 2 weeks time.  Instead they have been in the world for 3 weeks on Sunday and are doing their growing in NICU. I have been so bad at blogging their NICU story...but do not give up on me...I will be loading a photo journal of their journey soon and tell the story as best as I can.

In summary, they are both doing so very well. Finn weighs 2.1kg already and is in an open cot, wearing his own clothes. I gave him his second bath yesterday.  He is being nose tube fed and his next hurdle is mastering the suck, swallow, breathe skill - they start with bottle feeding soon and then I introduce him to breastfeeding! He sucks on my finger quite well already, but this ability only kicks in at 34-35 weeks...Once he has mastered this, he can go home! Rebecca needs to grow some more as she weighs about 1.7kg now.  She is a smaller baby, but at the same developmental age as Finn, so while she is a little behind with feeding, she also has to master the feeding skill better and put on at least 300g before she can also go home. They are both on breastmilk with a little top-up of formula if I don't make enough. We are hoping that they get to go home at the same time. They are beyond precious and I cry every time I think of how special they both are.

Life in NICU has been interesting and emotional and scary and incredible all in one.  I have not been myself and it has taken me quite some time to recuperate. The physical toil has been quite extreme and I think I have under-estimated the impact the birth has had on me. I have been so very very tired with extremely low energy. My muscle tone from lying in hospital for almost 4 weeks is poor. Having lost 32kg in 2 weeks has really been a shock for my system I think.  My blood pressure which is only stabilising now has also contributed to poor energy levels. My body has been sore, my mind exhausted and I really have not had the energy to blog as I should have been.

I have been expressing every two and a half hours as they are drinking all I produce so I live from express to express.  I have had to drop the 2am expressing though as it was killing me! So I express all day long from 5am to 11pm. I have also been getting up at 5am to catch a lift with DH to the hospital and then getting back late afternoon, so this has been exhausting....I usually run around like superwoman, so it has been a strange experience for me having to admit this...

There has been so much to say.  I am completely in awe of this miracle and the fact that I am a mother and have two babies.A mother...with two beautiful perfect babes...and a very special DH who has just blown me away with his remarkable strength and love. What a blessing I have been given. My heart has swelled with so much love for these 3 special people in my life - I didn't know it could ever feel like this. Words are simply not enough.