Don't know why I am so worried. Maybe it is because I just can't believe that all can be well. My IF past is really haunting me. I am going to make a serious effort not to let my fears based on my past experiences ruin this for me.
I am hoping that the scan will ease my worries a lot and perhaps finally I will be able to relax just a little without thinking the worst. Of course then, it will be the wait for the next scan which is why I am going to ask if there is anyway I can go for weekly scans until 9 weeks...I am sure Prof will understand.
Symptom update: Have only been mildly queasy almost all the time, but not unbearable and no fully fledged nausea. It sort of comes and goes...a constant sort of sea-sickness... Have been bloated and headachy and getting up at least twice a night to pee.
Every morning, I have been waking up and saying "I am pregnant and I am so very grateful" - oh how grateful and amazed and excited and on the edge of overwhelming happiness...
Why can I not just TRUST????
Roll on Tuesday!!!
I hope not too sea sick to inhale some cake after work tomorrow? Let me know if you are still up for it. Cell phone awol (again!) but hopefully will be located by tomorrow.
ReplyDeleteI think when you have been on this IF route so long its hard to relax!!! good luck with your scan!!
ReplyDeleteOoops - thought the scan was today! all the best for tomorrow - I am sure Prof will understand if you want regular scans. This damn IF and all its baggage..
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Hey Cam...I am waiting patiently for oyur scan too. When you are TTC everything works in 2WW...when you are pregnant it changes to 3 Months waiting...once your first scna is done, you wait for three months...then second trimester, then third trimester...then baby born...then Baby three months old...but all of the waiting is such fun. Enjoy
ReplyDeleteOnly one more sleep today! Before you know it, you'll be on that table and seeing your bean(s)...
ReplyDeleteI know how hard it is to trust, especially with your history, but pick a point in the pregnancy (whereever that maybe - hopefully not too late) where you consciously switch off the fear. We picked 12 weeks as our "no more fear" point. It really helped and has allowed me to enjoy my pregnancy instead of "missing out" on it cos I'm too scared of the "what ifs"...
SEnding you love and CANNOT wait for the good news tomorrow.
xxx
Only 1 more sleep!!! I think we are almost (probably not quite) as excited as you are. Can't wait to hear all about your perfect scan tomorrow and see a beautiful pic or two. Good Luck and big hugs.
ReplyDeleteAunty Cam. Why dont you go speak to someone about your fears? Perhaps there is someone who can help you cope with all the conflicting feeling? Some traumas are just to big for us to deal with on our own? Could be good for you and babas... Sending you love
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